Report and Request FREE Naloxone Here

REMEMBRANCES

Sam

Hello…
My ex girlfreind n mother of my son has just passed away a week ago from drug overdose…she had just been released from jail on bail by her dad…he did it out of love…but two days later he found her on the shower n she was gone…her n i had been split up for 8 years but i had always cared for her…but for the last 5 years she got into sniffing pain meds n escalated to using needles…my son caught her using in her bedroom 3 years ago so i took him from her he was 6 at the time ive had him 3 years n now hes 9…he always kept hope she would straighten up n get sober…but im an ex cocaine smoker of 10 years(been sober from that 5 years n i quit drinking aswell)so i know the rabbit hole she wss headed down…but 8 did have hope because i cleaned up,i thought she could too n finaly we could get back to co-parenting like we had n shared a kind of freindship we once had…but the morning of oct.28th 2019 her dad sent me a text telling me she was dead…i had been taking my son to school n had already dropped him off when i got the text n immediately ran back to find my son,but my head felt a mess like static in my mind n i couldn’t find him in the school yard within all the other kids n then i found him he looked at me an ran waving when he seen the look on my face n stopped n i said “its not good buddy” “your moms dead” he just fell apart n so did i…her n i had a strange relationship after we broke up alot of tention n fighting at times,to learning how to co parent…i tried to mentor her into thw steps of quiting n how i did it personally n i nvr had one slip or anything n stayed in my same small town in Ontario Canada…but she wouldnt listen to reason what so ever n told me reasons why she SHOULD be on pain meds…i thought she was crazy but i always let her back in our lives…she would steal stupid shit n tell lies n i would fight with her n say shot i didnt really mean…she would leave but would always come back till one day we faught n she didnt cone back…i thought she wss in jail cuz she had court n missed it n sure enough a month or so she sent a letter from jail…i was glad to know the worst hadnt happened n she was safe…she wrote her last words to me in it…she made promisses an was gonna try n sober up n she missed her boys n what not ! I thought great she finally gets it n maybe there was hope for her…then because my son was split from his younger brother he has court ordered visits with mothers father who has custody of my sons brother…my son was going for his weekend visit with his grandpa n brother n her dad mentioned to me he was gonna let my ex see my son n i said ok,but u bailed her out ? I said thats risky eh ! I mentioned how her mother n i had talked about my ex moving to toronto area with her mother n he said ill talk to her about it n they all left…my son says he had a night with his mother n brother n it was very very nice they played together n she colored with them in her special coloring book n they slept n she was there in the morning n made breakfast,then my son said he seen her on facebook n he didnt like it cuz (im very open about life with my son so when the worst happens hes somewhat ready) when she was on fb is was for trouble n he even at 9 knew it…then she left n he eventually came home to me…i thought all weekend she would come throwing rocks at my livingroom window as she did all last winter calling my name over n over, but she nvr showed the i got that text from her dad…her mother blames her father becuz he bailed her out ! But hes absolutely destroyed by all of it he found her in his bathroom n has this guilt but he also has my sons bother whos real father is a bum n has nothing to do with the boy n i cant even find him on social media or anything to inform him…i feel like i need to tell someone like cas to have someone professional to keep an eye on him b4 his daughters death he was a shut in n his daughter hated it n now he seems worse n hes soooooooooo sad n i dont blame him but i question his ability to give a greiving 7 year old boy the proper love n care the boy needs…im not wanting to cause him more grief by taking the boy bit hes so sad its just not right for the boy !!! Plus my ex n i had talked alot in the last year about what she wanted for her boys n she was happy with the job ive done raising our son, but she hated her dads a shut in anti social who wouldnt apply for the housing hes already on to get him n my sons brother a 2 bedroom apartment (their in a black mold infested one bedroom building the city owns currently) n he 5ook the boy completely out of public school to home school him against his daughters wishes n doesnt do the school work at all n theres no one i ont.to check up on him to make sure he doing it with the boy which he isnt all n all hea doing a bad job n now hes super sad to boot…his daughters last wishes were to get clean n take her son back from her dad…but untill then we talked enough about it…she wanted both boys with me n if not with me atleast back i school n doing programs…im greiving n i doing so i want to honor her last wishes…ita been tough i dont qant to hurt her dad more but i need to think about whats best for her sons n her last wishes…goodbye sam,ill take care of those boys no matter what…

im an atheist so i dont belive she looking down…but i believe in the love shared n honoring memories of her…

Did you recently lose someone to SUD?

Please accept our condolences and use this community space as a way to memorialize their story.

Scroll to Top
Receive the latest news

Subscribe To Our Newsletter

REMEMBRANCES

Share Their Story

Share their story to commemorate their life and acknowledge their journey.

Please share your personal story, remembrance, or LIFELINE message of hope and support.
You can create a custom summary with up to 55 words for your Remembrance to be displayed in the main Remembrance page. Otherwise, the site will display the first 55 words of your text.
Click or drag a file to this area to upload.
We recommend pictures in landscape orientation with at least 720px wide.
Tell us how you would like us to attribute the message. Example: Use your first and last name, your first name only, anonymous.